Good Byes

I had to say goodbye for more times than I would have liked, but everyone can say that. No matter how many times we do it, even for the greater good it still stinks. Though we will never forget what we've given up, we owe it to ourselves to keep moving forward. What we can't do is live our lives being afraid of the next good bye. Chances are, they are not going to stop. The trick is to recognise when a goodbye could be a good thing and a chance to start again.

Its not easy to start over knowing that you have a past that will continue to linger at the back of your mind, be it a failure, a mistake or even a broken relationship. People resort to suicide, anti-depressants just to suppress these memories in the hope of moving on.

I once lived in the shadow of my past, but life brought me a new perspective. My biggest failure in life was loosing my self-esteem for absorbing what people have to say, making my-self feel miserable when people gave me sh*t, missing that A and watch my dream of getting into the university I want evaporate in thin air, watch my mother's disappointment because of my failure. . It hit me hard, but this was one 'goodbye' i wanted to say. Saying Goodbye to my low-self esteem, to the hell-hole Kolej Tuanku Ja'afar which never did bring any good to me, saying good-bye to the horrible back biting, torture which gave me the lesson of how evil one can be.

I had the chance to start again in University of Exeter.

Being in the University of Exeter I had a few goodbyes to say that really hurt. First was to my close friend Nathaniel who left to travel the world and the other who decided to move to a different university. And dear friends who graduated after their final year. Every goodbye I bid came with a beautiful memory for me to keep.I am pretty sure Big Guy upstairs has more adventures installed for each and every one of us. Sit back enjoy the ride and learn a thing or two on the way.

Coming on to the final year of University, I realised how much I have grown both physically and mentally, although i will only be starting my 3rd year soon. It hit me hard that this year will fly by and the hardest goodbye ever will be uttered then. I will have to bid goodbye to the dearest friends I ever had and whom i might not see again in life. Graduation day will be filled with tears of both joy and sadness. These friends of mine are like family to me and I will have to start all over again from scratch to built my career and pursue my education.

Looking at the amount of Good byes I will have to bid and how much it has changed my life, I am grateful for it as each end means a new beginning a new opportunity and one more beautiful memory. Cliché as it might sound, it is has very much of truth in it.. Life is Full of Expectations :)